The Alpha Ego

 

Some of the greatest leaders alive can be described as alpha male/female. They are smart, demanding, have little patience for people’s emotions, and are adverse to risk taking. Their toughness has gotten them where they are and enabled them to attain what they have. While many stand on the outside looking in admiring their attitude and attainment there is a downside to this intense tenacity.

 Upon moving from observation to investigation it can be determined that leaders like this often have trouble listening, being patient, and admitting their need to continue developing as a leader. The mindset is often: “If it ain’t broke, why fix it?” I get it, you’re winning, your successful, you’ve reached heights you never dreamed of, and you’re now enjoying head swimming blessings. Your alpha tendencies have been a key factor in you achieving and attaining, but are you fully aware of what your alpha ways communicate to those who work with you or for you? If not let me clue you in…

  • It’s my way or the highway

  • I don’t need to adjust to people- they need to adjust to me

  • If you can’t do it my way, I’ll find someone who will/can

  • No one “gets it” as quickly as I do so I’ll just do it myself

 Intentional or not, you’re communicating that you have an unhealthy ego! Now don’t get me wrong, ego is important in building self-confidence and technical expertise, but not as a leadership tool when interacting with people. Instead of supporting, inspiring, and encouraging your team, you’re more than likely diving deeper into destructive behaviors and here are the results:

  • People around you feel discouraged and thus give up on trying to do their best

  • People revert to individual agendas as they feel they have to watch their back rather than look out for the team at large

  • People spread the negativity like the flu… bad feelings spread quick!

  • People do just enough to get by as a result of not feeling valued or respected

 Over time these factors create a long, high, unscaleable wall between team members and the alpha leader as well as among team members.

 Ok, Stephen. I’m an alpha leader so how can I do better at checking my ego at the door?  Great question, so glad you asked.  Here are three simple, but effective mindset shifts that you can employ:

  1.  You don’t have to know it all. Allow others to be heard and their input used.

  2. You don’t have to take every opportunity to prove you’re right & others wrong

  3. You don’t have to focus on changing others minds or behaviors